I’ve been thinking a lot lately, especially about death and life and things like existential angst. I lost my mother about an year ago, and also lost a really really good friend of mine to ovarian cancer soon after. I’ll not delve into my mom’s memories now, because am saving that for another post. So this friend of mine, let’s call her A. She was such a strong girl. I can’t even begin to imagine what it would have been like for her. I mean what would you do if you knew you had only a certain amount of time left in this world? I would have gone stark raving mad and buried myself in self pity. Or gone into complete denial. But this girl, actually told me what to do, after she passed away. Told me to give her boyfriend a hug. Told me to live life a little more, because she couldn’t. Told me she will love me, even from up there. She passed away on the operating table, right after surgery. And I couldn’t handle it at all. I blamed God, blamed the world, blamed the doctors. But then, slowly started realizing it wasn’t helping at all. I thought of what she said to me the day before her surgery. That she has no regrets. And that she is happy. Like really. I wonder if I can ever be that strong. Or that brave. What would you do?